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You are not an ordinary person. This is not an ordinary job opening.

UPDATE: I have closed the window for applications for now. Thanks everyone for reading / sharing this. I’ll make an update when I zoom in on the right candidate.

So this is me opening up to you. I will tell you my deepest flaws, so I can politely ask for your help.

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Source: Holstee Manifesto

You see, I love creating things.

From quirky costumes, to creating 2 successful companies in 4 years (one sold to Groupon, another to Catcha Group). I am still under 30 years old and have many more things to create in this world. Primarily, I’m talking about creating 40 more super-successful companies across Southeast Asia, although it may sometimes involve randomness, like these beautiful spaces, or this beautiful vegetable powered project. The next few years I want to create more than I ever have.

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Source: Esquire, Oct 2011. http://sophiagoh.com/writing/khailee-ng/

This is why I need your help.

I cannot create everything alone. I need help of others who are good at things I suck at. In specific, I need help in the fundamental gears and systems which power my creative spirit – the day to day management of my life. As you will soon discover I am pretty messed up.

Your role in this? Some politicians say ‘Special Projects Officer’. Some business folk say, ‘Personal Assistant’. For me, I can see relevance in both terms, because there are 2 very, very important pillars to this job: Precision and Systems.

These examples will show you what the job entails.

Challenge Precision Systems
I meet a ton of new people every week and lose track of everyone, and never seem to be able to get back in touch with some. Digitize all my namecards. Iterate on my Relationship Management System which ‘buckets’ everyone I’ve ever met into different groups, with timely communications to each.
I can’t keep track of my personal / corporate expenses. Money magically disappears from my account every month and I don’t know why. Process my shoebox of receipts to corproate claims. Summarize data to inform my personal budgeting decisions.
I often skip meals, making me cranky Image may be NSFW.
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:P
Go pick up high protein snacks to prepare me for super-packed week. Learn to predict / correlate my calendar to my dietary needs.
I appear late for meetings when I mis-calculate travel time between locations. New cities, new venues. Always a nightmare for me. Research travel time between meeting venues and call me to caution me to ‘make a move’ Over time, create a plan for ‘regular’ meeting spots in the city I work with and organize my meetings there.
I forget to follow up with people about specific tasks. Process my to-do list and act on specific items on my behalf. Understand my work habits and help schedule ‘free time’ in my days for me to process specific tasks.
I have a crazy idea but need to know by end of day if it’s a good one Do background research on Google and gather data to build a case for me. Help keep a log of my ideas as I rant them to you, so over time we can see patterns, or rehash old ideas anew

See both elements of Precision and Systems in every challenge?

People tell me I cannot find someone who can help with both. It’s usually one or the other. But I want to believe it’s possible, or at least, I can work with someone who has tremendous Precision, and over time, we can build out the Systems thinking along the way.

In other words, work with me, we will grow smarter, together.

If you ask others who work with me, you will know that reflection, learning, and new ideas permeate everyday conversations. And you’ll be one of the top people I interact with everyday. If you like my journey thus far, you will like learning from it, with front row seats!

That being said, make no mistake, the job is not at all easy or gratifying in conventional ways.

Warnings in advance!

  1. This job is tedious. It involves very operational work in Precision. Arguably, 80% of the job will be gruelling. Contacting people on my behalf. Running around town on errands. Going through my messy work desk. Data entry. We don’t have much space for error, so be ready to perform a variety of such tasks every day, with precision.
  2. This job might get lonely. Although you will interact with a broad range of people, including some very important and inaccessible folks, your primary work day is quite solitary.
  3. This job involves exposure to hyperactive elements. I am talkative, and have many lame jokes and puns. Most of them are likely to be not funny. Though you’re not obligated to laugh, I cannot guarantee you will be laughing on a daily basis.
  4. There are no conventional ‘promotions’ (though there are definite increments and bonuses over time). The sense of growth comes with the things I’ve created with your help. For the bulk of it, results will be seen over time. I’m looking for someone who is with me for the long haul.
  5. This job evolves. Sometimes instructions are crystal clear. Sometimes there are no instructions. You will need to improvize, ideate, and find solutions in the midst of extreme ambiguity, and often, urgency. If you crave certainty and predictability, you will get some, but on somedays you will have none.

Final warning: A video of me to give you an idea if working with me is a good idea or a bad one. LOL

That being said, this job has its rewards.

  1. Purpose and Adventure. The things we will create together will be epic, and exceptional. And the process will be full of the unexpected. You might be able to tell your grandchildren about the time you almost got eaten by an alligator. Or perhaps the time your Excel Spreadsheet almost crashed. Or how an alligator ate your spreadsheet. Failing which, stories from great businesses and innovations in Southeast Asia and more.
  2. Learning. Prepare for an expansion of your mind. What you see from the above is just the beginning.
  3. Flexible work location. Some days will require us to meet, or for you to run errands. But your primary work station is anywhere you want! Perhaps at home, or a cafe?

Interested to apply? You must read this:

You absolutely need to have impeccable English and comprehension, spoken and written, and your own transport. You must live in PJ/ KL area in Malaysia.

You must use this form to apply. This form makes sure you are not judged by your age, gender, looks, experience, or CV designing skills – but you are evaluated on your substance alone – and hence I can offer you your $$$ accordingly.

So no need to mail your CV, just use this form to apply.

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Source: Peterjthomson.com, A quote historically attributed to Abraham Lincoln, Peter Drucker, and Alan Kay

Please help!

We live in a time of abundant opportunity to create things which will impact the world in all kinds of ways – and you’ll see that everything we’ll be working on will be anything but ordinary. I hope I can find the right person to help me.

PS . Think this role is worth filling? Share this on Facebook / Twitter…!


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